This morning, while I was outside with Matthew (the Maine Coon), I opened up my Notes app to jot down my to do list for today. Apparently, I haven’t used the app in some time because I found a note I left in there that I would apparently need the next time I opened up the app. It contained Anthony Hopkins’s “Powerful Words.”
It’s funny how the universe works, especially when it concerns matters of the soul. The note was something I left for myself because it concerned one particular person.
When I left the note for myself a couple of years ago, I was frustrated at the time. Things didn’t work out. The universe prevented me from doing the things I hoped to do (like move to France at that time). But now I see why the universe was stopping me. Certain things needed to happen first, and it had nothing to do with me.
The same quote kept popping up yesterday for me. It said that just because things don’t happen when you want it to, it doesn’t mean it is not going to happen. Things happen when the moment is right.
When I saw this note this morning, I had to say to myself this was never about me and how I felt. This was about the person I was thinking of when I saved it. The universe made sure I saved these words so I could share these words when the moment was right. The Universe is always making sure we find the right words when the people dear to our souls need to hear the Universe speak, especially when the Universe is working its magic.
ANTHONY HOPKINS – Powerful Words
′′Let go the people who are not prepared to love you. This is the hardest thing you will have to do in your life and it will also be the most important thing. Stop having hard conversations with people who don’t want change.
Stop showing up for people who have no interest in your presence. I know your instinct is to do everything to earn the appreciation of those around you, but it’s a boost that steals your time, energy, mental and physical health.
When you begin to fight for a life with joy, interest and commitment, not everyone will be ready to follow you in this place. This doesn’t mean you need to change what you are, it means you should let go of the people who aren’t ready to accompany you.
If you are excluded, insulted, forgotten or ignored by the people you give your time to, you don’t do yourself a favor by continuing to offer your energy and your life. The truth is that you are not for everyone and not everyone is for you.
That’s what makes it so special when you meet people who reciprocate love. You will know how precious you are.
The more time you spend trying to make yourself loved by someone who is unable to, the more time you waste depriving yourself of the possibility of this connection to someone else.
There are billions of people on this planet and many of them will meet with you at your level of interest and commitment.
The more you stay involved with people who use you as a pillow, a background option or a therapist for emotional healing, the longer you stay away from the community you want.
Maybe if you stop showing up, you won’t be wanted. Maybe if you stop trying, the relationship will end. Maybe if you stop texting your phone will stay dark for weeks. That doesn’t mean you ruined the relationship, it means the only thing holding it back was the energy that only you gave to keep it. This is not love, it’s attachment. It’s wanting to give a chance to those who don’t deserve it. You deserve so much, there are people who should not be in your life.
The most valuable thing you have in your life is your time and energy, and both are limited. When you give your time and energy, it will define your existence.
When you realize this, you begin to understand why you are so anxious when you spend time with people, in activities, places or situations that don’t suit you and shouldn’t be around you, your energy is stolen.
You will begin to realize that the most important thing you can do for yourself and for everyone around you is to protect your energy more fiercely than anything else. Make your life a safe haven, in which only ′′compatible′′ people are allowed.
You are not responsible for saving anyone. You are not responsible for convincing them to improve. It’s not your work to exist for people and give your life to them! If you feel bad, if you feel compelled, you will be the root of all your problems, fearing that they will not return the favours you have granted. It’s your only obligation to realize that you are the love of your destiny and accept the love you deserve.
Decide that you deserve true friendship, commitment, true and complete love with healthy and prosperous people. Then wait and see how much everything begins to change. Don’t waste time with people who are not worth it. Change will give you the love, the esteem, happiness and the protection you deserve.”
Everyone needs a sick day pantry to prepare themselves for the inevitable: the day you feel under the weather.
Most people never think about preparing for their sick days at home when they plan for life’s little emergencies. They usually wait until they are sick to buy the things they need. They never prepare for the inevitable…the day they are sick. So why wait until you are sick to get what you need when you can just prepare your home for the sick day that is eventually going to come? You should have your own sick day pantry.
Sick Day Pantry
Just like you need to have your own food pantry for the basics you’ll need when you cook, you should also start a sick day pantry for the days you are not feeling well. You don’t have to have an entire closet filled with the necessities. You just need to make sure to have these items stocked in your home.
Where to begin? Start with a list. This is a list you can refer to as you slowly put together your pantry. You don’t have to accumulate everything in one shopping trip. Just keep your list handy and pick up the items you need every time you shop. Soon, you’ll have your own complete sick day pantry.
Each and every person is different when it comes to what they need to comfort themselves when they’re under the weather. Make sure all of your go to sick remedies are listed as a priority on your list to purchase first, before adding any of the other items to your pantry. For any prescriptions you need regularly, make sure to always have them at the ready.
SOUPS: Whether you prefer Campbell’s Chicken Noodle Soup, broth, or your own batch, make sure your cupboard or freezer always has those sick day soups on hand. If you make your own, make sure to freeze a container of soup (and label it) each time you make a large pot of soup. Or if you prefer the soup from your favorite restaurant, order an extra one to add to your freezer. That way, you can have a variety of soups to choose from on sick days. Remember, you are building up your stock when you are healthy. You can still use these items when you are healthy, just remember to make it a habit to continuously restock every time you shop, order out, or cook.
COLD/FLU MEDICINE: Everyone has their own go to medicine. From NyQuil to Halls Cough Drops, make sure you always have it available. Keep NyQuil and cough syrups on the shelf and check their expiration dates. Do not refrigerate. For cough drops, the best ones that work instantly are the Ricola Lemon Mint drops. They’re also great to carry in your bag for those rare times you have a coughing fit when the entire room is quiet (think theaters, meetings, transit, etc.). We all know, that’s when coughing fits love to make their appearance.
PAIN MEDICATION: Make sure to keep a variety of pain medication in your arsenal, because not all medicine is one size fits all. From acetaminophen (Tylenol) to ibuprofen (Advil) to whatever works specifically for you, make sure to have a variety of pain medication on hand at all times. This includes pain relief medication like Midol for those who use it.
ALLERGY: Always have allergy medication. As we grow older, our bodies change. One minute we can eat a certain food, the next minute we are suddenly allergic to it. Always keep on hand the allergy medication that works for you. Benadryl may work for you, but Claritin and Allegra may not, and vice versa. Buy what works for you and your household. You may also have a need to keep an epi-pen in your arsenal. If this is you, make sure you have enough on hand in your home and on your person. [ALLERGY MED HINT: Having coffee with an antihistamine helps to stave off the lethargic reaction.]
FIRST AID KIT: A First Aid Kit is a must. It will have everything you can possibly need in case of a tiny emergency. If your kit does not include Neosporin, make sure to add it. [NOTE: Band-aids do not last forever. If you have 20 year old band-aids, it may be time to replace them.]
EYES: Do not wait until you are on your very last pair of contact lenses to see the eye doctor. I had to use one pair of contact lenses throughout the entire pandemic before I could restock. Not to mention, my glasses broke at the start of the pandemic. Lesson learned. Always have your yearly supply of contacts filled, along with contact solution and eye drops. Don’t have just one pair of glasses, have a backup pair, just in case something crazy happens like the world shuts down.
MEDICATED RUB: There are some people who grew up with the comfort of having Vicks VapoRub massaged into their chest or back when they did not feel well. Believe it or not, it’s not just for what ails you. It helps take the itchiness out of bug bites. Just apply it to the bug bite on your skin. For mosquito bites, in some cases, you may find the bite disappears the next morning. If a bug bite remains 3 days or more and it’s still swollen, see your doctor. Some bugs can carry infections that require antibiotics. For medicated rubs, the generic brands work just as well as the name brand. Also, tiger balm has it’s own magical properties. You can find tiger balm in Asian stores.
ELECTROLYTES: Gatorade, Propel, Pedialyte, electrolyte water, etc. should be added to your pantry. You may not think you’ll need this, but you do. It helps keep you hydrated, especially if you are vomiting or have diarrhea. Even if you’re a little under the weather, one glass a day (while you are sick) will help you mend faster. If you prefer all natural versions, try Ultima Replenisher electrolyte mixes. They come in a variety of flavors. Pedialyte also comes in liquid, powder, and popsicle form. If you have pets, electrolyte water can help them when they are sick. Some cats and dogs can have Pedialyte but check with your veterinarian before administering it to them. [NOTE: It is a good idea to have a myriad of options at home. You can easily take powder packs on the go, or keep them at the office. For those with pets, make sure to have electrolyte water and a bottle of Pedialyte. While vets recommend the no flavor Pedialyte, Matthew Lucifer (the Maine Coon – pictured) will only drink the flavor version. He refuses to drink electrolyte water. When your animals get picky, make sure you have options to see what will work.]
HONEY: Honey is excellent for treating colds, sore throats, the flu, and seasonal allergies. For people with seasonal allergies, you should look to purchasing local honey. Local honey comes from the bees in your area, so that means any pollen that could be affecting your allergies are being harvested by local bees. Many stores carry local honey. Just read the packaging to make sure it’s from someplace near you. For instance, if you are in California, you shouldn’t buy local honey made in New Jersey. That won’t help you. Buy only local honey from your neck of the woods.
Also popular for what ails you is Manuka Honey. This type of honey has a long list of benefits from supporting wound-healing and antibiotic-resistant infections to maximizing gut health.
Note that not all honey is made equal. There are a lot of counterfeit honey options out on the market (think molasses or brown sugar and water). Make sure you do your research before you buy honey. Fake honey won’t help you. For those with pets who suffer from seasonal allergies, giving your pet a tiny bit of local honey every now and again [one to three times a year] will also help them during allergy season.
LEMONS: Lemons are an excellent source of Vitamin C and flavanoids. A hot cup of water with fresh juice from a lemon and honey can help soothe a sore throat or a cold quickly. If you add lemons to your diet (either as a juice or using the peel in recipes), it serves as an antioxidant that helps prevent diseases and boosts your overall health’s wellbeing.
NATURAL REMEDIES: There are many tested, but true, remedies out there across the globe. If you have a go to natural remedy, make sure you always have those ingredients in your pantry/refrigerator.
One ingredient that is a MUST to keep in your pantry is cornstarch. It speeds up the clotting process. It is safe to use on cats and dogs when they are bleeding. This includes bleeding around their mouth.
TISSUES: You can easily buy a set of six boxes of tissues for a few dollars. You will thank yourself later that you have a back stock of tissues you can go through and you don’t have to use toilet paper, paper towels, or your sleeve when you have a runny nose.
VITAMINS: B12, C, D3, Elderberry, etc. are vitamins you should take regularly. But when you start to feel off, B12, C, D3 and Elderberry can all do absolute wonders to help you fight off an illness. Coupled with electrolyte water, soup, and rest, you’re sure to kick that sick feeling quickly.
COMFORT FOOD: Sometimes the only thing you want when you have the flu is orange juice and Oreo cookies (or maybe that’s just me). Whatever your comfort food craving is, there may be a chance you don’t want to keep these items stocked. Consider snack packs and as they start to reach their expiration either donate them to your office coworkers, give to the homeless, etc. After they expire, just throw them out (do not donate). For juices, you can freeze them as ice cubes and use them to liven up a drink or to have as popsicles.
Or you can do like I do with these two comforts. The second you feel off, buy them for that just in case this is the real deal. That way, you have them when you need them. If it’s not an illness, woo hoo! Oreos, mimosas and Netflix are in your future.
Other Items to Stock in Case of Emergency
Besides just the basics of cotton balls and cotton swabs, make sure to add these items to your medicine cabinet.
FOOT CARE: Corn removers, blister bandages, and moleskin tape (to prevent friction and blisters, as well as add extra cushioning for calluses and corns). Depending on what ails your feet, you may need additional items to help relieve your feet from pain. Everyone gets blisters every now and again, so make sure you have those bandages or moleskin tape.
HEATING PADS/COLD PACKS: If you use these, make sure to have them in your Sick Day Pantry.
HUMIDIFIER/AIR PURIFIERS: Having both are very important during sick days, winter months, and allergy season. Vornado makes excellent humidifiers, just make sure to add extra filters to your sick day pantry. The filters need to be replaced every 6 months. Or if you are a heavy user, you may need to replace it every few weeks. You’ll know by looking at the filters. The blacker they are, the sooner you need to replace them. For air purifiers, there are new models every year that outdo the next. Research the year’s best air purifier and go with whichever one suits your needs and budget.
MENSTRUAL CARE: Sanitary napkins, tampons, menstrual cups/underwear, always make sure to have a back stock ready for yourself and for guests. Also, make sure to have your choice pain meds, chocolate, and heating pad at the ready. [NOTE: Make sure to only buy organic. There are many menstrual care products that cause more problems than they do good. For instance, many tampons and pads on the market are designed to make you bleed more. Some products have been linked to infertility, cancers and miscarriages. There are some ‘organic’ brands that are not really organic. Go with brands like Seventh Generation and other similar companies. Online companies like Thrive Market and Grove Collaborative (both require memberships) help take the guesswork out of it for you and only sell items that are good for you and the Earth.]
ETC.: Grow aloe vera in your home. It’s a cactus, so it’s easy to maintain. It’s great for skin application from sunburns to using as an antiseptic on cuts. [Note: there are studies that do not recommend ingesting aloe vera long term. It’s excellent as a topical application, and should be used mainly for your skin. While there are benefits to ingesting aloe vera, there are many medical studies that do not recommend ingesting it long term.] While you can buy a bottle of aloe vera, having a living plant in your home and snipping only the little bit you need is far more eco-friendlier and better for the environment. You don’t have to worry about the plastic bottle or the product expiring. You can also freeze aloe vera leaves to prep for sunburns.
If you have a green thumb, try growing different herbs like mint, basil, lavender, marigolds (fights fever and treats acne), chamomile and others you might like to use in a tea or in your recipes. Even grow some cat grass or lemongrass for your cats to help them when they’re not feeling well. Make sure to always check if the plants are safe for your animals before growing plants indoors.
How to Stock Up
You do not have to stock up on everything all at once. Keep a list handy of items you need to add to your pantry and pick up an item each time you shop, especially when you see a good deal. Check sales in your area. Clip coupons. Use your saver cards. Buy generic. Also, don’t be afraid to buy some of these items at a Family Dollar or Dollar Tree.
Also, do not overstock items that can expire, especially if you do not foresee yourself using those items before the expiration date. Stock up on items that you will use regularly like cotton balls, cotton swabs, tissues, menstrual care items, and food you will eat whether you are sick or not. Even Gatorade and Propel expires, so make sure to not overstock on those items, unless you see yourself as using them before they expire.
Sometimes that deal of 2 bottles of NyQuil calls to you, but think before you spring for 2 bottles. If you are shopping for one, you will probably only use 1 bottle a year. That second bottle could expire before you even open it. Start shopping for the next bottle AFTER you open up a bottle and start using it.
If your company adds funds (free money) to an FSA/HSA card for you, or if you add funds to a card yourself, you can use the card to pay for many of these items to build up your sick day pantry. The CARES Act of 2020 expanded FSA/HSA rules to allow use of FSA/HSA funds on items such as menstrual care products. You will also find that these funds can be used towards OTC drugs, PPE, foot care, acne products, acupressure products, and so much more.
As you can see, I haven’t done a lot of blogging during the pandemic. I really didn’t have much to share or talk about. It’s easier using Instagram, posting up a quick pic, some language and pressing send. Blogging (or just simply spending the time to write) takes a little longer. Frankly, I was just not in the state of mind to write until now. I want to talk about making small changes. It’s what we need right now as we move out of the pandemic.
I wanted to share what I’m doing in hopes that it will inspire others who are in the same boat as me.
Over the last few months, I’ve been making small changes to my life. I started off by upgrading my life, by giving myself permission to stop living like a peasant and upgrade to a life that’s more my caliber. It is so wonderful having an actual dishwasher, garbage disposal, washer/dryer, gym, and a place for Matthew to run around in. I guess staying cooped up in your apartment for over a year can help you re-evaluate your priorities. We now live in a Maine Coon sized home and frankly, Matthew never wants to leave to go running around outside. He’s perfectly fine running around inside the apartment. There’s more than enough space and high places for him to jump around on.
But if you are like me, the pandemic may have added a few pounds to your physique. Not like we needed any more weight on our bodies, right? For me, I gained 20 pounds. Now, before anyone gets on the whole body positivity bit, I did not need an extra 5, 10 or 20 pounds on my body. Gaining weight gave me health issues. Plus, I am in peri-menopause, so with my body changing, compounded by weight related health issues, AND the fact that over 70% of people that die from Covid-19 are obese, you can’t tell me to be positive about my weight gain. This isn’t about how I look. This is about how I feel living in this body. And I feel like crap.
Ok. Maybe it is a bit about how I look, but my health concerns outweigh my shallowness.
Throughout most of the pandemic, especially after putting on the 20 pounds in the first 6 months, I’ve suffered from really bad acid reflux. My hair was thinning and falling out. A wisdom tooth actually broke off. My body got weak from lack of exercise. I was getting UTIs more and more frequently (which ended up being hormonal issues). My anxiety was at an all time high (thanks to the anti-Asian sentiment in my neighborhood). I wasn’t doing so well.
In April, my landlord decided to evict everyone living in the building. This wasn’t a surprise. The building was slated to be demolished to make way for the new gentrified neighborhood. But contracts were held up and he decided to move to phase 2, renovating the building since he could no longer demolish it. I was given a year and a half notice, so it wasn’t any surprise. My landlord did ask me to return or move into the new luxury property when it opens. But after I heard what the town said about keeping the neighborhood white, I’m going to not move back there, since a lot of my anxiety stemmed from the anti-Asian sentiment I received after the lockdown happened in March 2020.
Since moving overseas was still not an option due to the pandemic, I decided to sign a lease for an apartment in a luxury building that caters to celebrities and athletes. I don’t regret this decision at all, because the whole premise behind upgrading my life was about changing my life one small step at a time…to give myself permission to live the life I’ve been wanting for such a long time, but was unwilling to give that life to myself.
The first change in this journey to upgrade my life was to move out of the place I lived in for 15 years and upgrade to something better. Upending my entire life helped to kick me out of that miserable pandemic funk and think about starting a whole new and better life. Next, I started decluttering my life and getting rid of the things that I no longer wanted to carry with me in life. I upgraded my wardrobe and my things. But still, I wasn’t completely happy.
So I targeted those unhappy parts of my life: 1. I wasn’t happy because I wasn’t writing. 2. This extra weight on my body doesn’t make me feel like I am me. I don’t recognize this person anymore.
So I decided to change that.
I am a big believer in taking a problem and putting it in a box. In one corner, you put the problem. At the opposite corner, you put the end result that you want. You throw the tools into the box and tell yourself, “Fix it.” So that’s what I started doing. I started fixing myself, one small step at a time.
On Writing
Rebecca Roanhorse, author of “Black Sun,” shared her writing method on how she outlines using Scrivener. I’m not a fan of the Scrivener program, but I liked her concept. So I took how she outlines her books before writing the entire book out, and decided to do something similar, but on paper.
I love paper, so the idea of prettying up my work and using paper to outline my story helped me tremendously. Binders and note cards were ordered so I could start writing out scenes, because I think in scenes. I focus on one character and write out all of their scenes, put the note cards in a plastic sleeve, and organize the scenes in the binder that way. It’s been a tremendous help, especially since I feel like the beginning is going on forever in the book. Readers don’t like beginnings that go on forever. They want to get to the juicy bits quickly.
I will say that the strange thing about my universe is that I tend to call things into my life that I totally did not expect, but it’s really magical. When I write, I cast the character. In this case, I casted an actor that I believed embodied what I was looking for in this character, based on the roles I’ve seen him portray. So while my head is stuck in my book, writing out the scenes, what I wasn’t prepared to find was said actor sitting in our courtyard when I took Matthew outside to eat grass. I honestly do not know what to do with that knowledge. I’m just going to keep on writing, because that’s like the universe saying, “You’re doing exactly what you are supposed to be doing in your life. Keep going.”
I can honestly say that I have ideas and hopes of what my future will look like with these changes, but I’m always up for things going better than I planned, because in dreams, we cannot dictate what will happen in them. Crazy things happen all of the time within our dreams. So when you start living your dreams, crazy things will happen…like finding out the actor you’re currently writing scenes for lives in your building! Did not see that coming at all.
Mission Attainable: One Pound a Week
So now we are on to part two of my unhappiness and how I am changing that. I gained 20 pounds this pandemic and I honestly hate how I look. But what I hate more is how I feel. The crazy thing though is that I was vaccinated with Moderna. A side effect of Moderna is that it cures a lot of your health issues. I’ve experienced it and I’ve heard a number of people tell me the same thing. I haven’t had acid reflux since I received both doses of the vaccine.
I saw my doctor a month after my second dose. She performed every test there was, because we are looking for the second tumor in my parathyroid (we did find it, but it isn’t doing anything that requires removal). The blood tests came back saying there is absolutely nothing wrong with me. I just needed to lose the weight I gained during the pandemic and that was it. So Moderna fixed all of my ailments I was experiencing throughout the pandemic. It’s crazy. It even kind of offset the peri-menopause a little bit, which is really weird.
So now that I am vaccinated and have the all clear from the doctor, I can focus on weight loss. I will admit that I didn’t start right away. At first, we were going to go the medicinal route with weight loss. That ended up being a no go from the insurance company. So my doctor sent me a diet plan outlining my new way of life.
This diet is the same boring old diet that doctors have been recommending for decades. Whole grains, fruits, vegetables, fish 2x a week, etc. Most people would just roll their eyes and then do whatever the latest fad diet is out there. BUT over the last 4-5 years, people who believe in science say to trust science. Trust doctors. Trust scientists. So this is where I say, it’s time to trust the doctors on this one. They’ve been using this same food model for decades. It must work, right?
I’ve been slowly changing my way of life, because my main concern now that my body is changing, is what exactly am I supposed to be doing? What am I supposed to be feeding myself? As my brother says, we can no longer procrastinate with our health. We have to do it now.
Where does one start in this battle to lose weight? Start small.
I believe that when it comes to losing weight, so many of us sabotage our own efforts right from the beginning. We think of the end game, the magic size or number and work like crazy to get to that number, but when it doesn’t happen fast enough, we lose hope and give up. Anyone can lose 10 pounds in 2 weeks. I’ve done it many times. But it doesn’t last.
So I decided to set a realistic goal for myself. Over the next 52 weeks (i.e. one year), I am setting a goal to lose one pound every single week. Not two pounds. ONE POUND.
You’re probably thinking that anyone can do that. That’s the point. It’s a realistic goal. It’s very different than saying, “I’m going to lose 50 pounds this year.” One pound a week is a more realistic goal, because it appears simple and easy. Fifty pounds is a lot of work. It’s a huge number. But one pound is attainable. The 50 pounds mentality is where we sabotage ourselves into thinking of how much work we have to do over the course of one year just to get to that goal. It sets us up for failure.
But one pound in one week? Sure. Anyone can do that. It’s easy to put in the work to do what it takes to reach that goal every single week. After a year, guess what? If you accomplish that weekly goal every single week, that’s over 50 pounds in one year. It’s the same goal, but realistically attainable. And you put in the work to get there without even realizing it.
Do you see how you can trick your brain?
Small Changes
So that’s my goal and plan over the next year. My aim is to lose one pound every week by doing whatever it takes to reach that goal. That means changing my health for the better by making small changes every week. So far, this plan is working.
Changes I’ve made to help me lose one pound every week:
Started going into the office 2x a week. After being sedentary for the last year an a half, all of the walking and the countless stairs are helping me to get some exercise 2x a week. Next month, it becomes 3x a week.
I started taking Matthew on walks in his stroller 1-2x a week. Thanks to the pandemic, people have been more accepting of animals coming into their businesses. Matthew loves when we go shopping, especially the Hallmark store that has his itty bittys.
Eat fish 2x a week.
Switch to whole grains.
Eat more fruits/vegetables.
Drink 8-9 glasses of water.
Vitamins.
Stop ordering takeout.
Each week, I plan on making one positive change for my health that will not only contribute to helping me lose one pound a week, but will also help with my overall well-being.
A friend mentioned that eating out and delivery helped contribute to her pandemic weight gain and breaking from the eating out cycle is really hard, because it’s become the norm. I used to allow myself takeout on Fridays, but I always ordered a bunch of food and it ended up lasting until the next takeout Friday. Since I always keep a stocked fridge, all of the groceries were going to waste.
So I decided to make a change. I started budgeting my groceries to $100 every two weeks. Whatever I order, I have to use up during those two weeks. This is my way of consciously focusing on ending food waste in my own home. Since I’m focusing on choosing organic and pasture raised food, that means the food I have to consume is healthy and will help me towards my goal of losing one pound a week. I’m also saving money. I never budgeted before. A trip to the grocery store usually ended up being $300-$600, and then $50-$125 every Friday for takeout. Forcing myself to budget will save money in the long run…money that can go towards our new future.
This is where I go back and mention that problem box. In one corner is LOSE WEIGHT. In the opposite corner is WEIGHT LOST. What I’m showing you are all of the tools in that box being used to reach the end result. It’s not just about diet and exercise. There’s more to this than just that. There are a lot of facets involved in our unhealthy to healthy habits. This is about changing our lives for the better so that we can reach the end result.
The next small change I am going to make is to continue to declutter my new apartment and finish organizing everything. There’s so much stuff. I honestly do not know where to put everything. I also don’t like how this clutter is taking away from the luxury part of living. It’s time to let go of the old, so I can embrace the new. This falls under the mental health aspect of weight loss. I find that the way we live and what we surround ourselves in is indicative of the state of our mental health. To me, having a bunch of ‘stuff’ around us, not knowing what to do with it, is just like having a bunch of extra weight surrounding us and we don’t know what to do with it, yet all we keep thinking is…I WANT TO GET RID OF THIS!
So that’s what I plan on doing next. Decluttering and organizing. Getting rid of the things I no longer wish to carry with me in life, because I’ve changed my life for the better.
Stay tuned over the next year. I’ll be sharing my small steps and progress towards accomplishing my weekly goals. If you want more up to date information, follow me on Instagram: @michellekennethpw. You can find inspiration and ideas there, as well as a lot of books.
On Instagram Live [Year of Me Challenge Video 2], I mentioned I would do a post on where to find products to beautify your flatlay photos for Instagram, so here we are. My first post in months.
To simplify everything, I’ve created an Amazon store that you can access here [AMAZON STORE] or in my bio on Instagram [@michellekennethpw]. In the store, look under “As Seen on Instagram – Backgrounds.” I added everything I spoke about in the video from pretty giftwrap paper to the foam boards to the photography background paper.
For those who were not able to see the video, that’s what this post is for. I’m going to share my tips on how to create the beautiful flatlay photos you see of food, books and various other products. Believe me, those gorgeous flatlay photos against gorgeous wooden floors are not really wooden floors.
Flatlay Photos Tip One: Giftwrap Paper
When I first started out doing flatlays, I used a lot of gift wrap paper I picked up from places like Paper Source or Papyrus. They have an array of beautiful one sheet paper that ranges anywhere between $5-$12 per sheet. Since I’m a lover of paper products, I would sometimes go in and peruse their selection, looking for the perfect backgrounds to use. It was my treat to self because the paper was just so beautiful.
Even something as simple as paint splattered on craft paper created interesting backgrounds for photos. While you could probably make this yourself at home, I’m not that talented. I purchased this from one of the Makers on Amazon.
One of the benefits to double-sided paper is that sometimes when you need just a blank background, but with texture, it serves as a perfect backdrop so you can add your own extras in the photo.
Ever wonder how people got their floors so immaculately clean EVERY SINGLE TIME they took photos using their floors as a backdrop? Or did you ever think, wow, they have incredible marble countertops? I swear I did every single time. Imagine my surprise when I learned their secret.
They were using Photography Background Paper.
There are various different floor backdrops out there. Most sheets of photography background paper are double-sided with two different backgrounds on each side. Costs for these sheets can range between $11 for a single double-sided sheet to $20-$40 for 2-4 sheets.
You can even find backdrops that can serve as a wall for pictures where you need a wall background for book stacks or just a clean back drop for regular non-flatlay photos.
They even have concrete floors for a more intriguing contrast.
I mean, have you ever seen a concrete floor so clean that you could eat off of it???
My favorite backgrounds though are for those who post about food. Not everyone is blessed with marble countertops. Yet, there’s a way to fake it.
For those who like a more wintry or darker background, they do have black marble countertop paper to use. I am considering trying the darker side of food photography later this year, but it might also work for those Instagram feeds that are a bit on the darker side.
Tip Three: Scrapbook Paper
I am relatively new to this tip. @notinjersey (Dara) was using a background I absolutely loved, so I asked her where she got her photography backdrop paper. Imagine my surprise when she shared it was scrapbook paper.
Scrapbook paper comes in varying sizes. I recommend getting the 12×12 (or larger, if that exists) for your flatlay needs. Each package contains 2 sheets each of multiple backgrounds. This may be the most cost efficient method for those just starting out or those who want to not invest a lot of money into this. I bought two packages of scrapbook paper and it cost a little less than $6 each.
For this photo for The Photographer, I used two sheets from the package I purchased.
In this photo, I am using only one sheet of the scrapbook paper.
Tip Four: The Extras for Flatlay Photos
For this tip, I want to give a shoutout to @stephsbooktherapy for this little tip. Go to her Instagram for a tutorial on how to use foam boards with your photography background paper (Tip Two).
I purchased two of the largest foam boards I could find on Amazon, but it ended up being too small. Steph informed me she had to get hers custom cut to fit the actual size of the photography background paper.
So since I’m stuck with these two boards that don’t fit my paper, I started using them for something else. I use them as a flat surface for photos. I can still lay the paper down on top of it or binder clip one side and tuck the corners down underneath my couch cushions (or have Matthew sit on one side of it to keep the corners from curling).
Since these are white boards, they can also help serve as a way to soften the photo or refract the light to brighten the photo. Just position the white board outside of the frame. You’ll be able to see the difference. Find the right spot with the light and then take your photo.
In the photo above, Matthew is sitting on the white board. You see how it brightened up the photo and gave him a softer look? No filter or adjustment was needed.
Truthfully, yes you can live without these boards, but if you’re serious about this, I think it’s worth buying a couple, or even getting them custom cut to fit the photography backdrops. It will just make your life easier when you go to photograph your flatlays. For Steph, she uses one board to create the wall, and the other to create the floor.
Here’s the shop [AMAZON] where you can find everything I’ve referenced in this post, including the white boards. You will not be able to find the actual gift wrap paper I’ve used in Tip One. I’ve listed similar items in the shop. If you love paper as much as I do, I recommend Paper Source and Papyrus to view their handmade collection.
When I first started this site, I called it Diary of a Perfectionist Wannabe. It was borne out of the desire to be perfect, to have a sense of perfectionism. This is a trait many Asian Americans understand. We strive to be the best, so we try to perfect ourselves in order to be accepted.
When I read “Searching for Sylvie Lee” by Jean Kwok, I understood why I always had this desire to strive for perfection. It is because I am trying to be accepted by a family and a society that has rejected me because I am not 100% white.
Yes, I said family. My brother and I are a bit of the outliers in our family. My mother is Thai and she married an American in order to escape the slavery she was subjected to in her home country. She wanted to give her future children the opportunity to grow up and live in a world where their family would never sell them in order to put food on their table.
She gave us freedom, but also gave us hell. We were the ones who were not accepted, because we were the minority in our white schools. Our racist Christian family pretended like they loved us, but we knew they didn’t. They tolerated us, because they had no choice. It was the Christian thing to do…pretend to love these kids because they’re blood, but they’re not white.
Love was not something we received from them. We had to search outside of our home for love. I spent most of my life trying to prove to them that I existed. I just wanted to be accepted. The thing is, the world accepted me, but my family never did.
I remember when I invited my wealthy aunt and uncle to an Indy 500 party. Senators and everybody that was anybody in the political world was there. Senator after Senator told my aunt and uncle what a wonderful person I was and how they thought the world of me.
The look on their faces was not one of being proud, it was of shock that these Senators even knew I existed. It was so much easier for them to believe that the life I lived was a complete lie. It did not fit their mold of what they believed I was…someone who would never amount to anything. To them I was not anyone of importance, no matter how many Senators spoke so highly of me and knew my name.
These are things I carry with me even to this day. Like Sylvie Lee, you get to that point where you just want to give up and not care anymore. If they don’t see you now, they will never see you for who you really are. They will never accept me as someone they could love, all because my mother is not white.
It doesn’t matter that I grew up in a white household and the only thing that connects me to the Thai culture is just the food (something I can’t even make). My mother made sure to assimilate us into the American culture, because she was running from her past and wanted nothing to do with it.
I understand that completely. I understand running from the things that have hurt you and caused you pain, looking to start over again. I’m watching it happen to my friend right now. I see her pain and humiliation. I’m watching her preparing to run. I see her not giving a shit about her life right now, because truth be told, no matter how many times she tries not to talk about it, I know what it’s like to be in her shoes. It took me eight years to get over the last guy that made me run.
That’s the thing about pain. When people wound you deeply, you lose all sense of yourself. You walk through life like a ghost, just trying to survive the monotony and move on to the next day. We’ve all been there.
I don’t even like to admit how hurt I was when my boss left. I never thought it would effect me the way that it did. For the last two years, I’ve stopped living my life. I just settled into the flow of existing. Hell, my Instagram feed just screams that I am part of the floodwaters. I’m not me.
That’s what’s been missing these past couple of years…me. There was a time I lived in the VIP world. Yet, these past couple of years, I’ve not done anything. I didn’t go to the opera or the ballet. I barely saw friends. Hell, I barely go out to the movies. All of those celebrity filled events, film festivals, rubbing elbows with directors, actors and fashion designers…I stepped away from.
They’re so busy creating and living, while I’ve fallen into that world that they despise…the mediocrity of life…all because someone hurt me.
So I’m writing all of this, because my universe keeps saying live for today. That mantra is on repeat every single day.
Someone I know recently retired. Then they found out they had stage 4 colon cancer. That’s also known as the death cancer. The lesson here is don’t wait for tomorrow to live life. Do it now, because you are not promised tomorrow.
I tell myself this every single day…since last June. Yet, I did not let it truly sink in that I am not living. I’m just doing the bare minimum to withdraw from life and go on autopilot. But the truth is that it is okay to let yourself grieve and to go numb for a little while. Just don’t stay there so long that you forget who you are and what you are meant to become.
I have been trying very hard to write daily. Sometimes I write one page in one month. That is just how withdrawn I’ve been. I started to see the people that inspire me withdraw from me, because in the grand scheme of the way things are done, you can’t keep sucking the life out of them. They’ve got to shine, and they can’t have you around dulling up their sparkle. They need other gems to sparkle alongside them.
Which leads me to why I am writing this today. I have been out of it for two years now. For some strange reason, I feel like I’ve woken up from a dream where nothing gets done. I looked at my final receipts for the clothes I bought last year and it amounted to $1500. That is so not me. That means, I just did not care. I had emptied out my closets, wanting only easy pieces to wear. These were items that took absolutely no thought whatsoever to pull out to wear.
I realized recently that something was amiss. This just isn’t me. That wake-up call within me finally happened. Now, I’m ready to get back to my life and living it.
This means I want to share my world with the people that come here to read or go to my social media to view. It means not just putting a book up in front of me for you to see, but letting you see more into my life and what I am doing, as well as the things I am trying to accomplish.
The fact that this is my second post this month is a huge step in the right direction.
So with that step, let me tell you what I plan to do from here on out. In my previous post, I shared I wanted to read a book a day. Oh, believe me, that is still a goal. But I am going to take a little step back in the reviewing process, so that I can spend more time writing.
I plan on going back to the film festivals, going to the ballet, operas and Broadway. I plan on hanging out with rock stars, like I used to do. I have every intention of dining out more and trying all of these incredible places that Manhattan has to offer. I plan on building up my wardrobe again. I also plan on buying my first house in the upcoming months, because I need to move in that direction.
Oh yeah, a developer purchased my apartment building. I was told they are giving me a year and a half before they begin the eviction process. I believe that is the amount of time they think they will need to be able to purchase up the remainder of the properties on my block, so they can tear it all down and build something more modern.
I’m kind of tired of people doing that to me and my home, so I am just going to go and buy a place. I spoke to a mortgage lender and we walked through the process. I have more than enough money for a down payment on a house, so it is just a matter of finding the right property.
So right now, my apartment is basically halfway packed up. It’s basically boxes everywhere.
Matthew has had severe allergies over the past few months. First, I came home to the Maine Coon from Pet Semetary and had to run to the vet’s office because his mouth was bleeding again. This time, it wouldn’t stop. We got him on meds fast enough. But come the next month, he needed stronger meds, because he scratched up his face so badly, that it took a couple of months for it to heal. The vet says that like humans, as we get older our allergies get worse. It’s the same for cats. So I’m looking forward to more bleeding and itchiness for the little guy.
Other than that drama, I’ve been thinking lately about the life I want to live. Living is the important part, because that’s the part that’s been missing from my life these past two years. I was stuck in a moment I could not get out of…and once I realized I was stuck in a moment, I decided it was time to get out of it and start living again.
Now, I know there are people that go out there, travel the ends of the earth, completely stuck in a moment inside of themselves, trying to escape it. But the truth is we cannot escape ourselves. We will carry that pain, sorrow, humiliation, and grief with us no matter where we go. A new destination does not mean we will be free of our tormentors. Because we still carry what they did to us no matter where we go to try and heal. Moving forward begins inside of us.
Change begins when we decide we need to change ourselves. What happened to us does not define us. Who we choose to become as a result of everything that has ever happened to us, that’s up to us. We hold that power to become better than we were yesterday.
Me? I’m just tired of waiting for my future to happen, when I know I am the one in charge of creating my own destiny. The universe just falls in line based on the energy I put out there. Change begins within me.
I may strive to be perfect and to create a more perfect system in my life, but I know I am always going to want to be a perfectionist, and never a true perfectionist.
For the family who never saw that perfect child who is a far greater success than anyone else in the family, I may not exist to you, but I exist to others. They see me and they love me for who I am and all my imperfections. They’ve taught me that you were wrong. This is not normal. I deserve better, because I am a way better person than you are. Just too bad you didn’t want to know me at all. Then again, I’m better off not wanting to know you anymore.
For those who know Matthew Lucifer, they know he is a very unusual cat. Actually, he is just not a normal cat at all. He is highly intelligent and understands everything. He also knows how to communicate what he wants very effectively. We’ve been through some stuff, including dealing with Maine Coon allergies. Here’s what happened. Scroll to the 2023 Update at the bottom of this page, if you want to learn more about what we learned from Matthew’s allergies.
Surita’s Passing
Back in August 2018, I made the difficult decision to help Surita die. She was 21 years old. When I told Matthew it was time to let Surita die, he became so upset. She was in the kitchen at the time. He ran up to her, collapsed in front of her and started crying. I was so worried he was going to tell her. I wanted her last week of life to be a happy one.
Those two never got along. Surita hated him, but he loved her.
He wanted to be there when we euthanized her, but Surita did not want him there. I didn’t want her to go into death seeing Matthew staring back at her, so I kicked Matthew out of the apartment.
Surita.
He cried on the other side of the door wanting back in. That is unusual for him, because when he goes out into the hall, he runs around. This time, he wanted to be there for her.
I held her until I felt her spirit leave. After she had passed, I let Matthew back in. He sat down next to her, checking out the two strangers in his home. Then we motioned to Surita and he looked down.
He said a few words, kissed her and walked away. I asked him, “Is that all you are going to say to her?” He responded in the affirmative.
They boxed her up and took her away. My baby girl.
He was depressed for a month.
Letting Surita go was very difficult for me. I think I struggled with if I made the right decision. I realized during that last week that she was asking me to help her die. She was in a lot of pain. I miss my baby girl.
These two never got along. This is what happened when we received a Kitnip Box. Matthew wants everything in the box. Surita just wants the treats and maybe one toy. All of the rest belongs to him. And yet, that one toy I would give to Surita, he would manage to steal it back and that would be the only toy he would play with out of the entire box. Christmas was no different. He only wanted her gifts.
The Bloody Mouth
So Matthew Lucifer had a medical emergency. He was showing signs something was amiss for some time, but it was hard to figure out if this was something serious.
Saturday morning, he woke me up. His kiss was a little wetter than usual and then I saw the blood on his chin. I got out of bed to wash the blood off of my face. When I turned to check on him, the blood was gone.
The rest of the day was fine. But when he showed up for bed that night, his mouth was bleeding again and it wouldn’t stop. The animal hospital was closed for the night, so we had to wait until the next morning to call them.
I sat there watching him bathe himself in blood. I just stared at him in shock and disgust thinking…this is why your middle name is Lucifer. You bathe yourself in blood and you don’t care.
The bleeding continued after he fell asleep. He woke me up at 3AM (like he does every night), shook his head and sprayed blood everywhere. It was so bad, I had to change the sheets. I started Googling what was wrong and the only thing that came up was that he had gum disease and possibly a bad tooth.
When we got up a few hours later, his mouth was still bleeding. I read that I should try cleaning the blood with a cotton swab, so I handed one to him. He chewed on it like he normally does. We did this three times and then the bleeding stopped.
When I called the vet hospital, Matthew sat next to the phone waiting for the receptionist to pick up. The second she did, he started talking into the phone. I assume he was telling her what was wrong. We made an appointment for that afternoon.
I had him take an early nap with me, because I knew this was going to be a long day for him, especially since the doctor visit was during his nap time.
When it was time to go, I put his coat on, made a little blanket cocoon in his stroller, and we walked the mile to the hospital, going farther away from home than he’s ever been. He actually enjoyed this little adventure. I could tell he was nervous, but excited.
At the vet’s office, we discovered that Googling at 3AM is not wise. My baby did not have gum disease. He was having an allergic reaction.
The vet noticed there were scabs on his back, which I knew were from a mosquito bite. We had a few flying around a few weeks ago, and I know he started scratching right after we encountered them. She double checked to make sure it wasn’t fleas and luckily, it wasn’t.
That bloody mouth of his was all about that mosquito bite. Add the fact it is allergy season, and he has allergies, it sent his body into a white blood cell tornado frenzy. His lips were swollen (which I noticed right before his sister died, but couldn’t remember if this was normal for him).
All of these different allergens were just too much for his body to handle, so that’s why his mouth started bleeding.
Come Monday morning, the doctor says his blood tests were fine, except he had anemia. He’s three points below what was considered normal. I asked if this may be because he bled so much the night before. She replied that is what she thought, but the specialist said it was more likely due to a blood disorder or a parasite or…
I’m thinking, “Doomsday much???”
So we have to go back for more blood tests the day before Thanksgiving. He has another round of steroid shots in a month. He also has to take a daily medication (which he ironically likes to take via syringe) for the next 30 days.
Luckily, he is responding very well to the steroids and medication. His lips are no longer swollen (the swelling disappeared the next day). He’s running around with more energy (good sign he is not anemic). And he stopped scratching.
Here were the warning signs something was wrong that was very hard to determine if something more serious was going on:
The scratching (he scratched his face, ears and his back). Scratching is not normal for him. I could not determine if this was fleas, mites or something else because it was a new spot every time.
Swollen lips. He had 2 little open pockets under his upper lip. I could not remember if this was normal for him or not. Ends up, it was not normal.
Itchy nose and lips. He would use his brush to aggressively scratch his nose and lips.
Scabbing on his back (from the mosquito bite).
I am surprised Matthew started bouncing back so quickly. He loves his medicine. I explained to him that he needs to eat right after he takes his medicine or his stomach will hurt. So he eats immediately after each dose.
With this little guy, communication is very important.
He Brushes His Teeth
He heard the doctor and I talking about brushing his teeth daily and how he likes to brush his teeth himself. I just have to hold the toothbrush for him.
Matthew is extremely intelligent. He understands everything. Since the conversation about brushing his teeth, he now goes into the bathroom and tries to brush his teeth by himself without my help.
He still hasn’t mastered turning on the faucet yet, so I still need to help him.
The Baby Gets Spoiled x10
As of right now, I think he likes all of the attention he’s getting. He likes being told he’s a good boy and he’s doing a good job. I think he’s taking advantage of all of this attention…you know, worrying the hell out of his Mama. He is not eating right now because he knows it’s worrying me. Loss of appetite is not a side effect for what is going on.
The side effects for his medicine are actually eating more and drinking more fluids. So I think this whole ‘loss of appetite’ is an attempt to get my attention. Either way, I’m going to pick up his favorite Friskies (that he’s not had since his sister died, because they don’t sell them in individual size and god forbid the food come from the refrigerator) and Korean fried chicken for dinner tonight.
When Surita was alive, I would get Korean fried chicken. I ate the skin and gave the meat to Surita. Matthew preferred the skin too, so he’d grab an entire piece of chicken from out of the box and go crazy. He can eat three all by himself. [He is a sugar fiend, so the sweet fried chicken is cat nip for him.]
So if Friskies and Korean fried chicken do not revamp his appetite, I’m going to have to let the doctor know he’s not eating anything except dry food and a few bites of wet food after his medicine.
Unfortunately, for Matthew, he’s medically grounded from going outside. I broke the news to him this morning and he looked at me like…you’re telling me the doctor betrayed me?
He’ll be able to get around that grounding by being confined to seeing the world through his stroller.
2023 Update
When I first published this back in 2018, this was just the beginning of Matthew’s allergies. Ends up, that bloody mouth was due to an allergic reaction to his food (plus, add in being allergic to mosquitoes and fall seasonal allergies). We switched him to a hydrolyzed protein diet, then slowly started adding foods back to see what he was allergic to. Ends up, he’s allergic to processed chicken and turkey, which seems to be the case with many cats and dogs these days.
He’s currently on a vet diet eating only Royal Canin PR and PD, along with Tiny Tiger and Sheba seafood. He gets Thrive Market’s wild caught tuna on Sundays. He also eats whatever I’m eating. He’s not allergic to chicken or turkey, unless it is processed. If you think about it, we have no idea what they are putting in processed foods.
His food may cost more than mine does, and it scares me if Royal Canin can’t get their food into the US (it’s sourced and made in France), but this is the only thing he can eat without turning into a bloody mess.
Another issue that came up for Matthew during this time was a swollen paw. It got worse and worse. It ended up being allergy related. When we moved, it healed within a month. So it is possible that the previous apartment was an environmentally bad place for us to live, as far as his allergies went. Moving someplace more modernized helped him completely.
He hasn’t had any major allergy issues since we moved. He doesn’t need steroid shots anymore. [Long term use of steroids is bad for him.] He’s still running around outside. He still has seasonal allergies in the fall, but luckily, he hasn’t ripped the hair off of his face. During the fall allergy season, every other day, I give him a little bit of local honey harvested from the bees in our area. That seems to help him a lot.
Some tricks I learned when the allergies got really bad: 1) use cornstarch to stop the bleeding (vet suggested this); and 2) use unrefined organic coconut oil on areas where they’re scratching a lot (especially, if there’s a wound there from the scratching). I need to stress that you need to use UNREFINED organic coconut oil. Refined coconut oil has stuff in it that can be potentially harmful to your animal.
Every year I order a box of Meyer Lemons from Birch-Hill Organics. It is a little treat I enjoy every year, because I love lemons and all things sour.
When I order a box, the question always is: what do I plan to do with all of these lemons? Here’s what I do…
Lemon Preserves
The main reason why I buy a box of Meyer Lemons is to make lemon preserves. These lemons tend to be sweeter than the regular lemons you pick up from the grocery store. They are also juicier!
Here’s how you make preserves: you will need canning jars and salt (along with the lemons). Make sure to wash all of the lemons well to remove any chemicals or pesticides.
Cut each lemon in half (start with five).
Add salt to the bottom of the canning jar. [I use sea salt.]
Press each lemon half into the bottom of the jar, squeezing out as much use as you can. [Note: Leave the rinds in the jar.]
Add salt.
Continue adding lemon halves, pressing them down into the jar, adding salt each time you add a lemon half.
Proceed to add lemons until you fill the entire jar.
Seal the jar and place on a shelf (without direct sunlight) for 3 months.
Lemon preserves are used in many French and Moroccan recipes. Yes, you eat the entire lemon in these recipes. Meyer Lemons are very pleasant to use as preserves in these dishes as compared to their counterparts, because they are not as bitter.
I make lemon preserves because all of my favorite French and Moroccan recipes call for them. These preserves are not so easy to find in stores. That is why I make my own. It is so simple to make. Plus, you are the one that has control over what goes into the preserves. You are not forced to guess what someone else is putting in store bought preserves.
A Green Cleaning Solution
For those who like to green their cleaning and keep toxic chemicals out of your home, this is how I make my own cleaning solution.
I keep a canning jar on my counter at all times and add citrus rinds to it. Instead of tossing used rinds into the trash, I remove the pulp from the citrus and add the rinds to the jar. I add white vinegar about a quarter or halfway up the jar. Then as the weeks go on, I continue to add the citrus rinds to the jar.
When it fills up, I wait two weeks before using the vinegar solution in the jar. I just remove the rinds (you can toss them at this point, but wait until you read the next section) and put the solution in a spray bottle. You can now use this as an all-purpose cleaner.
I would like to experiment with other citrus rinds (oranges and grapefruit) in the future to see what type of scent the solution gives off. Note: I do add lime rinds to the lemon rind jars too.
A Mosquito Repellent?
A little something I discovered recently is that this cleaning solution can actually work as a mosquito repellent, especially if you have a problem mosquito inside your home.
Just place the rinds in a bowl, along with a little bit of the vinegar solution, and keep the bowl in rooms where mosquitoes may roam. Change out every few days so as to not attract fruit flies.
So far, this has worked for me. Because this has been working, I keep the rinds in the solution in the jars. It is not mandatory that you have to remove the rinds from the jar and toss them. You can keep them in there as long as you like.
Someone suggested spraying the solution on your body before bed to maybe deter the mosquitoes from biting you. I haven’t attempted this yet, but if you do try this, make sure to dilute the vinegar solution with water before applying.
I think I would rather spray the bedding before applying the solution to my skin. But maybe one weekend I will try this, because I have read that vinegar helps with skin issues and balances the pH.
BONUS: If you are bitten by a mosquito, apply Vicks VapoRub (or a similar medicated rub) to the bite. This actually helps keep the bite from being itchy. Make sure to apply each night until the bite is gone. Usually takes 2-3 days. Also, just a FYI, it takes about 30 minutes for the relief to set in.
A few weeks ago, I started packing an extra lunch to give to the homeless guys on the block that I adopted in NYC. There are usually two or three guys on that block.
I started packing an extra lunch, just to up my thoughtful giving game. Instead of giving the guys a little treat pack, I would give them a meal that I made in my own kitchen. This was about sharing the blessing I’ve been given. If God deemed that my refrigerator and pantry be filled with so much food (more food than I can consume myself), then I should share the bounty.
When I changed my diet a couple of months ago, I noticed there were certain items I could not donate to the neighborhood food pantry. It made me ponder what I should do with all of this food I can’t eat anymore. That’s when I realized I could cook up a few meals and give it to my guys during the week.
I have a bread machine with plenty of flour. I didn’t know what I could do with all of that flour after my lifestyle changed. Then I realized, I can bake bread for them.
A few days after I came up with the idea of making complete meals for the guys, I saw a Facebook posting about someone who used to do the same thing.
When the writer of the story was a young boy, his mother used to send him to school with an extra lunch for one of the boys in his class. She told him, “Give him the lunch before school.” He didn’t understand why. There were times he would hand the boy the lunch during lunch hour.
He didn’t realize until he was older that the reason why his mother asked him to give the boy the lunch before school was so that no one would know his situation. It was a way of hiding that boy’s poverty from their classmates. Kids can be cruel. His mother wanted to protect the boy from that cruelty he would have received from other kids by receiving this charity.
The author realized the invaluable lesson she was instilling in him. There are kids today that are humiliated because they can’t afford a hot lunch. It is even exacerbated by the school system when children have their hot meals taken away and have it replaced by a cheese sandwich.
A bunch of idiots on a school board decided to institute those rules of cheese sandwiches when parents failed to pay their children’s lunch bills. It’s the school system humiliating the child in front of all of the other children, because their parents are not paying the school lunch bill. They’re punishing the child for their parents’ failure.
It’s not right.
Imagine changing that narrative if you are a parent. What if you sent an extra lunch with your child, just in case there was another child that was subjected to the cheese sandwich? What if you sent them with extra food for those children whose only food they will receive that day are from those school meals? There are some schools that have a private food pantry for impoverished children who are from homes that cannot afford food.
It is private so that other children do not know who is shopping that food pantry.
It is a shame that children have to fear other children finding out that they are starving. Children with the wealth of food on their tables should share with those who do not have that same blessing. This is a human quality that should be instilled in each and every one of us. We should not feel ashamed or overprotective of sharing our blessings with others.
I’ve seen people repulsed when I stop to give food to the homeless guys or stop to talk to them. Someone was telling me recently that he was out with a woman when they were stopped by a homeless man asking for assistance. He went to give him the few dollars he had in his pocket. The homeless man accidentally brushed up against the woman and she freaked out. She was so disgusted she said she had to go home and shower to get the homeless off of her.
When he told me this story, my mouth literally dropped. He re-emphasized the most important point, “They are human beings, too.”
We live in a world where there is so much abundance. It is unfathomable that anyone should go hungry in this country. How is it that we cannot share this wealth of food with everyone?
If you’re a parent, teach your kids a valuable lesson about being a thoughtful and giving human being. Send them to school with an extra lunch for those kids that are hungry. Get the other families to do it, too. If there’s no private food pantry, get the school on board to start one. If there is one in your child’s school, donate to it.
Kids that don’t have to worry about food have a better chance at succeeding in school. When they are focused on where their next meal is coming from or the fact that they are starving, they will fail in school. Even in colleges, this is an issue. Don’t think that just because someone got into college that they are not homeless or starving. They are still trying to better their situation, but it becomes difficult when they are looking at the clock hoping they get to the shelter in time or the fact that they are starving. When all you can think about is food, it makes it harder to concentrate on your studies.
It takes a village to help raise each and every child. We need to change the current narrative and stop being so divided. It is small changes like this that will help move our future as a society in the right direction.
For the adults, pack an extra lunch. You never know who you’ll encounter that may be hungry and starving. Maybe you already know someone that could use that extra lunch you’ve packed. There may even be someone in your own workplace or church congregation that can’t afford food.
Donate to your local food pantry. If there’s no community food pantry, start a giving box where people can put food in the pantry box. People that need the food can take what they want. This is about helping each other. No one in America should go hungry. Do your part and share your blessings with others. Not everyone gets that same blessing of a hot meal three times a day. Some people are praying for what you take for granted.
